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Monday, 5 December 2011

Humbugs, Tat and Sensory Overload

I have reached that point I arrive at each year where I decide, quite firmly, that Christmas shopping shall forever more be done online. And yet every year I make a mad foray into town and run the gauntlet of screaming children, quarrelling couples, and those people who seem to feel that progress is best made by charging full pelt into as many people as possible.
Add to that the constant assault of tannoy announcements proclaiming that this shop's special offers are by far the specialist offers in town, intermingling with truly awful music and the background hum of overworked air conditioning systems and you have a cocktail of sensory violence designed to test even the most determinedly cheerful of shoppers.
And then there's the usual seasonal tat that gets rolled out year after year. I have no idea why anyone would pay £15 for a penguin slide, optimistically named a penguin race. I watched for several minutes and I didn't see any overtaking! Then there are the miniature bottles of plonk with a branded glass, yours for £8, just don't work out the actual price per ml of alcohol, or you'll need to break the bottle open just to calm your nerves!
Bah humbug! Now I've become a seasonal grump!
I've always loved Christmas, but I suspect the only way to preserve that love may be to avoid shops for the duration.
P.S. No penguins (plastic or otherwise) were harmed in the making of this post.


  1. Is that the penguin thing in Hawkins? I couldn't quite understand it! I'm rather glad now that most of my shopping was done online!

  2. I think it must be the same one. I wasn't at all sure what the purpose was. There certainly wasn't any racing!